"We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly."

yesterday, i finally made up my mind and made a decision. i've been feeling so content and blessed with my life lately. i want to erase every bad and ugly moments i've had in life- my previous relationship.

why should you still be counting the months like we've used to? it's been almost a year since we've parted ways. so why must you still be doing it? you may think i'm still the same soft-hearted girl like i used to. i'm no longer the same person you think i am. the girl that has always been giving in to any issue that comes in her way, be it good or bad. you know, you shouldn't have taken advantage of one's kindness. maybe perhaps i behaved that way because you were the first love i had. whatever we shared, it was nothing but a mistake. there, i said it. and thank goodness, you were the mistake that i made. i've learnt from that and have been trying hard to abstain myself from not repeating it again now.

many must be thinking why i am still talking about you, blogging about my past with you, still. it's because i've deleted everything that has got to do with you. i admit, it has been hard. it was indeed very tough during the first few months after the breakup. but something good came out of it. and i'm grateful for that. i've deleted your msn, and so have i deleted you from friendster. but i still have one more task to do. and that is to burn every single piece of evidence that greatly reminds me of you. yes, burn. i wouldn't want to throw it just like that. burning it means much more to me. seeing memories shared with you turning into ashes, will make me feel satisfied, will mark the time that you've never existed in me, that you've never been a part of me.

i was revengeful, angry, utterly disappointed and disgusted with the relationship you left me for. but when i reflect back at the bad things between us, the time when you laid your fucking hands on me, the endless nights you made me cry for you, it's not even worth my time. i won't fall for your sweet words or texts anymore. i've fallen for it once, and it got me into a big mess. i had to be cleaning up your shit. i'm through with everything!

i hope you'll come across this blog of mine one day. or with all being well, your babygirl will stumble upon this. and when you read this, i pray hard that you'll stop giving me a hard time after reading it. i'm breaking the promises we once made. and that was to never stop contacting one another come what may. but yes, i'm breaking that promise. because i'm doing it just like you. breaking so many promises you made to me. only if i knew that those were just empty promises.. if only.